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They had enormous amount of say when it came to choosing their life partners and love marriages were quite common. Love marriages were quite common at the time and were welcomed by the society. Even the religious scriptures and literatures of the time tell tales of Gods and Goddesses falling in love and getting married. With the advent and adoption of tenets like Manu Smriti, the concepts of good and bad changed in the society.

It was advocated that words of the family head was supreme it was good karma to obey the elders. With that, the women were designated as symbols of honor of a family and were placed under the protection of men, curbing much of the freedom they used to enjoy in Vedic era. The caste system started being vigorously enforced and it became imperative that marriage matches happen within the set restrictions imposed by the religion and society. As a result, an arranged marriage became the norm where the elders employed the services of matchmakers who would look for suitable matches from faraway places.

Gradually, the concept of love marriage lost popularity and became an undesired custom in the framework of the societal norms.

Arranged Marriages, Matchmakers, and Dowries in India

India is a country where values and traditions are held above personal aspirations and happiness. Arranged marriages are the norm in this country where parents decide appropriate life partner for their children. A number of criteria are imposed to determine the suitability of these matches based on cultural backgrounds, social status, income, physical appearance and sometimes amount of dowry.

Young people choosing their own life partners attracted a lot of social stigma for them as well as their families. It was seen as the ultimate act of defiance that a son or daughter can exhibit. That frame of mind still prevails in certain parts of the country but on the whole the scenario has changed quite a bit. In urban and semi-urban areas especially, women have become much more independent with most of them receiving higher education and opting to have a career.

As a result they have much more opportunities to interact with people from outside their communities. Such interactions in many cases lead to amorous relationships which in turn lead to love marriages.

Love Marriage vs Arranged Marriage ~ Group Discussion Ideas

With such incidences being quite frequent in recent times, the concept of love marriage has become quite commonplace in urban and semi-urban areas at least. In rural and remote areas, the scene is still pretty traditional, partially due to lack of education and awareness. But the scenario is changing pretty fast there as well.

While arranged marriages still remain the prevalent way of getting married by the youth in India, love marriages are now free of the evil and accusatory outlook they earlier received, being more and more acceptable to people. The basic concept of love marriage lies in the fact that the boy or girl choses his or her life partner. There are no elderly supervision involved, although in India the approval of elders are sought before the boy and girl in love can tie the knot. The restrictions of caste, social status, physical appearance and even religion do not apply when a person falls in love and hence such clauses are not part of the marriage discussions.

In India where these restrictions are seriously enforced when it comes to arranged marriage, severely limit the number of desirable matches for a person. As a result they may as well has to settle for less in some or the other aspects. There is no requirement of contemplating dowry as one does not need to prove their worth through the amount of cash and jewelry to be exchanged. In case of love marriages, one might not compare such points and consider the overall compatibilities in terms of lifestyle, interests and hobbies.

As a result, the chances are very high that the partners will have great compatibility and similar tastes in leisure activities.


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When the children are born and both spouses work , finding adequate babysitters is a non-issue because the grandparents pitch in the care and nurturing of the children. The children are therefore supervised by close family members instead of by complete strangers, making them comfortable because they live in an atmosphere that they know well. For those who learn that arranged marriages are not necessarily forced, they adopt a more tolerant attitude towards this practice. One reason for this tolerance is that arranged marriages are a cultural trademark and should not be judged using western standards.

When marriages are arranged by elders or parents, this does not encourage spouses to make up their own mind about who to marry. This philosophy tends to put love in the back burner.

It is more important to consider the social and economic viability of the marriage rather than put romantic love at the forefront which will fade anyway because romantic love is at best a superficial feeling. For some Muslims and others who have, in particular, been living in the west for a long time, may find this closeness a little awkward and uncomfortable.

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Some marital arguments and conflicts are settled better when only the spouses are involved. When the in-laws interfere and impose their views, this can cause stress to the marriage. Arranged marriage is mostly accepted in our society as it lends credit ability, social recognition coming future as unmet expectation are a main cause of conflict in love marriages! I should have never married this man who had so many problems with previous relationships so many kids. I embarrass by his speech.

Add his confidence. I feel like I move too fast in marrying him after all this time I feel like I have a fake marriage. I married my current husband knowing he was in a previous relationship. I had no desire for him anymore I just stay in the marriage for security. But attracted to someone else. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Please subscribe to our YouTube channel.

Skip to content Notice: New posts will be published from 1st November. Love is the base of any marriage. In love marriages, there will be no question on whether love happens or not. In Love marriages, the couple knew each other very well and most probably they already understood each other fully.


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Planned love lives results in happy families. Generally, equality prevails in love marriages. Disadvantages of Love Marriage:- The couple who go for love marriage is mostly independent. If they want to get out of the relationship, they do not consider relatives opinions much.